MAM Memo 5/6/25

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Sunday’s Worship Service with Shameka Parrish-Wright
As your Interim Minister, I am going to firmly request that all First Unitarian Members who were not present Sunday morning, to watch the entire video of Sunday’s May 4 service. Both Linette Lowe and Councilwoman Shameka Parrish-Wright spoke about issues regarding the Breonna Taylor Protests that should be a part of every congregational member’s narrative regarding that time. Your viewing will enhance your sense of self and belonging as a member of First Unitarian Church of Louisville, and it will create a better foundation for the times in which we are living.
Even if you were there, you can watch again.  Or gather with some other folks to watch.  Here is the link.
 

Update from our Director of Religious Exploration
From Rev. MAM:  Last week, I shared that DRE Loren Crawford’s daughter, Jess, had suffered a stroke at age 24.  Here is the update as of May 6, 2025:

Jess is super busy at rehab.  She feels absolutely comfortable with the therapists and nurses. I am being trained in caregiving when I am here, but I’m able to go back to work too.  Just met with Dr. Kaelin. He is pleased with Jess’s progress, she is getting stronger and more independent each day. He believes she will make a good recovery. He says we may at some point see a blood specialist to investigate the results of all the Baptist East blood tests and see if more are needed. He is setting a discharge date of May 15th. He recommends she start outpatient rehab the week of the 19th at their Center for advanced neuro rehab on the 6th floor. Dr. Kaelin said that everyone loves having Jess here because she works hard and has a bubbly, positive attitude.

With Blessings for Jess, Loren, family, friends, and all the wonderful Health Care Professionals!   You all make the world a better place.
 

A Good Goodbye Revisit
For those who missed last week’s MAM MEMO, I am going to revisit my sharing about Good Goodbyes.  Of note, one congregation member emailed me to set up a Goodbye appointment and wrote,

“Hi Rev Mary Ann,
I’d like a good Goodbye appointment please!  I both want it and don’t want it  :)
Let me know when you’ve got openings. -Kathy G” 

Thanks Kathy Gapsis. Yes, doing goodbyes can often leave us with conflicted feelings.  But, as many of you know, our spiritual paths call us to embrace paradox.  And so this is a great opportunity to do so.

Our departures, when we say goodbye, are layered with grief, appreciation, denial, confusion, and many other experiences. Aha, I thought to myself on Saturday, this might explain the unusual sadness that I am feeling; it is different than my ongoing mourning for our country. So, yes, my friends, I can tell that I am starting to grieve my departure from the congregation, which will happen in mid-June. Recently, I have noticed that I am having trouble making decisions about things at church. Some of you may have noticed this (sorry); it’s a classic sign of grieving.

Recently, I read the classic text on “when ministers leave a congregation,” I’d forgotten that in the last 6 to 8 weeks, ministers themselves will experience sadness and even a sense of dying as they slowly begin to let go of their ministry with the congregation. Again, my Aha, I was sad Saturday, and I felt the heaviness of our impending separation on my shoulders Sunday.

My intention is to do a good Goodbye over the next six weeks or so. It will be good for you as a congregation and me as a minister. Let’s do it together. What creates a good Goodbye? Well, step one, for those of you who have not scheduled a goodbye meeting with me, alone or in a group, please do so. Usually folks schedule: 15 minutes, 30 minutes or 45 minutes. Send me an email to schedule. One person took care of this goodbye meeting with me in February! We still see each other, of course, but our proclaimed goodbye has happened. Also, some of you have texted, sent a postcard or emailed me your recognition of my leave-taking in June. Thank you.

Ministerial Absence: Part of the reason that I am experiencing some of the grief now is that I am keenly aware of my collegial covenant to practice ministerial absence once I leave in June. That means I will refrain from contact with FirstULou members, friends and staff for at least one year, perhaps more. This allows me to disengage fully from my ministry here and it allows you all to regather your energies and love with a new minister among you. I ask you to honor this absence that I, along with colleagues, have found necessary for our health and well-being as well as the health and well-being of the congregations that we have departed. Whew
 

Important Dates Ahead

  • Sunday, May 11th – I will be in the pulpit for Mother’s Day and here for the weekend.
  • Sunday, May 18th – My first of two Farewell Sermons. I am holding two farewells since many people will be gone in June. On this date, May 18th, there will be a big Farewell Party afterward, featuring a bit of a Star Trek theme. Our monthly luncheon will be part of the festivities.
  • Sunday, May 25th – I will not be participating in the service, but I will be around that weekend.  (See your Midweek Update to see how you can participate in the service!)
  • Sunday, June 1st – Our Adult Education Death and Dying Class will present their experiences from the year-long class we shared together.
    ALSO, on a lively note, the Congregational Meeting is that day after the service!  We will have our monthly luncheon for June.
  • Sunday, June 8th – Your new minister, Rev. Liz, will be joining me in the pulpit. It will also be Flower Communion Sunday! 
  • Sunday, June 15th  My Second Farewell day in the pulpit, Rev. MAM. A small reception after so we can break bread together.
 
Please be mindful of the time we have left. Also, note your own patterns of how you say goodbye, and be careful not to ignore your feelings or the process. We ministers are asked to share our feelings with you during this time.
Peace and Love, MAM